Women and Sex Appeal: Do's & Don'ts
Men you may take the stage, finally.
Women, poor us. So much wasted time and money.
This time we decided to do a survey between men to find out where we fail in our attempts to become more 'appealing'.
So what it is then that turns these men off about us (as we feel like we're the hottest things around)
(I'm sorry if my feminist side starts to come out in this article)
1. Too much makeup
I don't know if this is hypocritical or not, because then when you see us 'a little run down' they have no problems to tell you twice. Either way, I guess they don't like this damn makeup, they like 'natural' women.
But maybe they don't realize that underneath we're not all Belen Rodriguez, actually we look more like a bubonic plague attack without all that greasepaint that they complain about so much...
2. Coarse women
Yes women, men like girly girls. The same we don't like men that are too feminine, they don't like women that are too masculine. We're talking about behaviors like using blasphemies, burping like truck drivers, saying too many swear words... It's not very sexy I guess. So, if you thought your buddy approach was working, men aren't really buying it.
3. Fake nails or nails that are TOO LONG
Ok, this one we were all expecting. So why do we keep spending hundreds of dollars for these damn fake nails? I truly don't know.
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To follow we have...
4. Tight dresses on large bodies
None of them are telling us to stop being fat (yeah, sure) but they just mentioned that we shouldn't look like 'hung up Genoa salami' - actual words used. Big body = big dress. You know, men are pretty logical and pretty straightforward, right? I'd love to see what would happen if we all started dressing like shapeless bags...
5. The obsession with hairs
Men don't like this obsession. From either extreme: between those who takes off too much hair and spend all their time thinking about that and they end up looking like a baby, all the way to those who keep on too much hair and they don't like it because she looks like a yeti.
So then? We should just maintain a permanent regrowth? Perfect.
SPECIFICATION: armpit hair, uni-brows and mustaches bother, mostly, everyone.
6. Taking too long to get ready
Here we have a common point in both sexes. We need a new survey to find out objectively who is the slower one?
7. Too much perfume
No, they don't like our superstar-like perfume trail. In fact, many of them find it gross.
And me who every time I don't smell the odor on myself, I spray on half a bottle...
Also another point we have in common. Who would win?
8. Tendency to talk too much (aka 'stop breaking our balls')
Every single man felt like they had to specify this. But do we really break your balls that much? I mean, maybe we should start asking ourselves a few question. All of them are turned off by that type of woman who complains all the time and is upset.
Our men find them trashy. Heels are fine, wedges are not. Especially when they're combined with a skimpy dress that shows more shoe than leg.
10. Talking about your ex
And here we touch upon their fragile security... If you felt strong, cool and independent to talk about your exes without bursting into tears, NO! Men hate this and they don't need to know that they are not the only penis that you've ever seen in your life.
Let's move on to the things they do like, to instill some confidence back in us...
1. Sexy, but not provocative
Men - I mean all men - like when we are a little sexy, so I guess no shapeless bags. But it shouldn't be provocative! They're not confident enough to share your beautiful cleavage with the rest of the world. They only want to see you naked in their beds.
2. Natural makeup
As we said, our hours in front of the mirror are not appreciated. Rather, they prefer a woman who maintains herself well but with very little 'stuff' on her..
(Or a lot of stuff, but enough to look natural - they can't even perceive the difference - so maybe just wait a moment before throwing your favorite concealer in the trash)
3. A characteristic smell
Okay, at least here our thousand attempts to find the right fragrance for us haven't been a complete waste: men like to smell us and recognize our scent. BUT WITH MODERATION.
4. Beautiful hair
Apparently our men care a lot about our hair. So yeah, let's keep taking care of it and not leave our houses with a hot mess on our heads.
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5. When we listen
And sure, we can't break their balls but we have to stay quiet and listen to them, huh.
No, they weren't that aggressive but I think that everything they're not able to find in their little friends, they look for in a woman. A woman who listens is sexy (apparently). So let's gather some strength and listen to their complains, so that they don't run away crying to their mommies.
6. Being open
Men adore when we are open to things, OPEN NOT CRAZY, that they adapt, THEY DON'T ANNOY THEM, they like to go on adventures, try new things, experiment... in short, they like to see a friend in a woman, more than a little puppy dog.
7. When we share their interests
Did you know that a lot of men like to do 'manly' things with women? I haven't quite understood if they're talking about playing PlayStation with them or if they meant something else...
Anyway, I guess every once in a while these men would also like to share some 'manly' interest with us women as well, instead of their usual crew of idiots. Or maybe they like the idea that they can show off how much better they are than us at something.
Let's try to keep this in mind and create more space for their interests as well.
Women, the only general advice that we should follow from this is to try to overload ourselves but to show our faces and our bodies for what they are, and in some cases, 'try a little less'.
Aside from my feminist inclinations in some of these points, I actually don't think these men were cruel at all. They're encouraging us to be who we are and to highlight our natural beauty rather than spending hundreds of euros in products or useless services that just hide our natural true essence.